Cool Boarders 2001

Cool Boarders 2001 features a good-sized selection of "different" snowboarding events. The Career Mode is split into seven different types of events with 20 total. You can tackle the events in any order, with new events opening up after you complete the first round. The Downhill Gate race is just like it sounds, a downhill race and if you miss too many gates, you're disqualified. The Downhill Checkpoint trick race is an opportunity to do as many tricks as you can and to complete special sequences of tricks. The Half Pipe is just a half pipe of snow. Big Air trick slopes are giant jumps where you try to do as many tricks as you can before you land. CBX is an "extreme" downhill race that apparently doesn't stand for anything, but could just as easily been called "I wish I was SSX." Board Park is just like Half Pipe, but it's a more wide open area to perform the tricks in. And finally, Challenge events are events where you play "whatever you can do, I can do better" with a snowboard pro. There is also a Quick Race option and a two player split screen mode for every event.

So there are lots of options. I just wish the game didn't fall so quickly fall into a lesson in snowboardese. You can learn all sorts of fancy snowboarder vocabulary like "that was dope," "that was tight," "shred it," "tweak it," "hit that kicker," "killer," and my personal favorite "you jackalope!" But what in the holy blue hell is a jackalope (dunno, but maybe the Rock should use it sometime)? That's really all there is to Cool Boarders 2001. Everything else just seemed so cookie cutter, it's hard to even bash properly.

It's just kinda there. There's a whole list of things that are wrong with Cool Boarders 2001. The graphics are boring, every track looks exactly like every other track. I realize there's only so many ways to make snow and trees look different, but they weren't even trying. And the music is really bland, not even some crazed "extreme" heavy metal song to shake things up. Then there's the snowboard speak. It's just so corny and stupid.

The trick system is especially lacking. It's a complete and total button masher. As soon as you hit a jump, if you just start hitting random buttons and stop before you land, you rack up some huge points. It's not fun that way. The second way you earn points is goofy too. You have to perform Sequences of jumping or grinding on various landmarks. However, the controls needed to land these Sequences are hard. You have to be lined up just right, or else you'll fly right past your target. Takes a lot of fun out of the races.

There is also a terrible clipping problem where sometimes you'll fall straight through the ground when you to the area below you. Other times, you'll be snowboarding down the mountain knee-deep in snow. I don't care how much of a pro you are, that's not possible. And to top it all off, the load times suck.

Cool Boarders 2001 has it's moments at times. Some of the races are even downright fun. And the snowboarders are really unique. There's a kid with a giant afro a half naked riot grrl, a pimp, and a guy that looks a lot like the lead singer of Lit. It's just its so meh. There's no hook, that big, defining moment that shows this is a good game.